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Chapter 7

Wednesday, Dec. 14

            God has brought the end to another day.  The end to this one came none too soon.  Yesterday I expressed an interest in the morning cattle feeding, so Wayne came by at 5:30 to get me.   It was so cold in my room last night, I hardly got sleep. I declined going with Wayne and stayed in bed until 6:45.   I had gotten up and lit the fire, but John or Marc threw the boards out when they were warm enough. 

            Before I write about the day, it is important to express what I learned about the social set up here.  Ralph Stair is the leader who considers himself “the Last Days’ Prophet of God,” “next to God,” and “is never wrong.”  “Anyone who does anything concerning Christianity in the South has to answer to the Prophet first.”  He “thinks with the mind of God.”  These are his words and are repeated by everyone living here.  If anyone here denies it, they are purged. 

            Dave is the number two man.  He runs the farm, it is “his farm.”  He considers himself “next to the Prophet,” and if he’s “wrong, then the Prophet is wrong which makes God is wrong, and that can’t be, “ so Dave is “never wrong” either.  In fact, Dave says he is “equal to the Prophet.”

            The “older brothers” in control are Wayne, Simon, Curt, Enoch, and quietly, Ben.  Wayne is the big dog on the block.  They are all black men except Curt who works at the camp ground with Stair.  Ben seldom speaks out if at all, but he is left alone.  These men are afforded great autonomy to travel about, and rule over the “lesser brothers” who seldom get to see the outside of this community structure.  Enoch seems to be the least of the “older brother group.”  Except for Wayne and perhaps Ben, they all bend to Dave’s beckon call.  Dave’s relationship to Stair is subservient when the people see them together.  These men have proven to be totally devoted to the farm and are trusted widely.  I know Ben is married with children, Dave is married, Wayne, and Enoch are single.  I’m not sure about Simon’s marital status.

            The lesser brothers include Michael, Dennis, Timothy, Jacob, John, Marc, and Greg.  Until today, I have had little exposure to Greg.  More about him later.  Dennis is the only black man in this group, and he and Michael are the greater of the lessors.  Dennis puts up with a lot from Dave while Michael is mostly left alone.  Dennis and Michael are both married with children.  These two are allowed to drive into town on errands, which Dennis considers a great privilege.  The “younger” unmarried men are forbidden friendship contact with women, even those who live here at the farm. 

            Ben is a big quiet distinguished good looking black man about 45 years old.  He never says a word to except hello, and I think he’s comfortable where he’s at.  It’s hard to tell what he really has on his mind about the big picture. 

            My exposure to the way Wayne and Simon work together was more pronounced today.  Here is the type of man Simon is.  Simon is a short compact black man about 155# and 32 years old, 5’ 8’’ tall.  Simon is also called Timothy, in fact three people are called Timothy here which includes one of the children.  Simon is energetic and quick, has a strong smooth likable intelligent personality,  yet he is quick to parrot the beliefs of the group, and puts his whole self into serving it.  His type requires some leadership responsibilities to remain loyal.  If he was a lesser, he would not tolerate it.

            There are other men living at the camp ground that I am not aware of.

            The women have wound up in a sad lot.  They work from early in the morning until late at night.  Theirs is the job to tend to the children, keep the food prepared and properly stored, do the washing and sewing, make soap etc. for everyone on the farm.  They in essence attend to every need of the men and the farm, but unless they are married to a man, they can have no friendship with the men.  I was an exception, and in my short time here, I’ve tried to talk to the women.  I didn’t learn many of their names to remember, but here’s what I found out. 

            Ralph Stair’s wife is the big hen in the coup.  All the women do as she commands, and the men too.  The women are extremely uptight.  Thomas’s mother is down right combative, but she is a good mother.  She takes charge of the dairy in some mornings and some evenings, possibly all, except when Dave wants to show off to people like me.  Mary has a child, possibly married, is the better looking of all the women on the farm.  She is quiet as she works.  The old laundry lady has a firm personality and speaks to the men in a business like fashion.  She commands the lesser men to some extent when it crosses her duties.  Sarah is the only woman who made an effort to express herself to me.  All the others, about five, are black women and wanted nothing to do with me.

            Doug and his wife are visitors and I spoke with both of them often at meal times.  There is no restriction on me talking to Doug’s wife, but to all resident women, there is a clear discouragement of friendship. 

            The children are the pride of the farm.  They are well fed, well disciplined, well clothed, well taught, and very loved.  The little girls are not as well off as the little boys who get exposure to both male and female bonding within the group.  Dave takes to playing first parent to all the kids.  They like Dave, which is probably a point in his favor.  The kids range in age from infant to over 11, Thomas being apparently the oldest.  There are near 10 kids in all on the farm.   The men get no exposure to speak of with the girls except that it is their own child. 

2

            Dave gave his usual speech this morning and laid out the plans for the day.  His deep white southern accent which he tries to make sound black coupled with his personality makes him appear a fictional character from the funny pages.  It’s hard not to accuse him of putting it on to make himself feel like the big boss man and good old boy rolled into one.  His job has many responsibilities and requires leadership ability, but he treats these grown people like untrustworthy children.  Dave has little true respect for these people, and I dare say that they have not a healthy respect for him.  I am more aware of the descenting undertones which fill these people’s hearts.  But they remain.

            By this time, having watched him and heard the way he treats others, I have no respect for Dave’s person at all.  I am insulted for these people though they don’t help themselves.  I know that no one is perfect or totally likable.  This guy has rubbed me the wrong way from day one, and I have been totally respectful in my actions.  Dave is given over to an evil spirit, and that evil spirit breeds here like do the stray cats.   Everyone here is visited by it, and I believe they all nurture, feed and support it.  Its name is Contention. 

            After breakfast most of the men went to the corn bin at the grain barns to unload the trailer of corn we loaded yesterday.  Again they tried the grain elevator, and again it did not work because of the dead motor.  By hand, it is a hard job that will make a man out of you.  While working, the men are enthusiastic and constantly vie for the busiest positions.  No one wants to be left looking like a slacker. 

            On our travels to and from town, Dave spotted some fallen trees on the side of the road.  It was his intention to go cut up and remove those trees for fire wood before anyone else could.  But rain was promising to fall, so he postponed getting it until later.  This left us with nothing to do after the trailer was empty.  We gathered at the shops for assignments.  It seems everyone has his usual chores, and they were sent their way. 

            I was sent with John and Greg to clean the chicken coups.  The chicken coups are located straight across the main driveway west from the Fellowship Hall.  For the first time since my arrival, Greg was helping out this morning.  He usually attends electronics trade school week days, and only eats dinner at the farm, but today was a day off of school.  Greg is a quiet white man about 30, slightly over weight at 190#, 5’ 11’’ tall, has sandy brown hair and wears wire rimmed glasses.  How long he’s been here I don’t know.  I like Greg.

3

            Chicken keeping is new to me, but John was quite obstinate about revealing the “secrets of the trade” and refused to answer any questions.  He was hostile and rude.  To Greg though, he was nice.  The chicken coup is John’s responsibility I suppose, and I was intruding on his identity.  I tried very hard not to get mad at John, but he pushed my patience and I lost my cool. 

            “John, I don’t know why you’re being a jerk, but I’m telling you now to knock it off,” I warned.

            “What?” he said, “I can’t hear you.”

            “I said you’re not being too nice.”

            “Gosh, what’s that noise, I can’t hear you.  You’re so far away sounding.”

            “Now you’re being a total loser.  Don’t pull my chain.  You can’t,” I said.

            “Can’t hear you, the chickens are so loud, and you’re so far away now,” John repeated.  By his third round, I was no longer enraged against him  I came very close to clocking him a good one, and then I just felt badly for him.  John is a typical educated loser who has found his way here to be coddled.  He never grew up.  He’s a “runner” and a “snitch,” totally untrustworthy on an interpersonal level.  Too bad.  I knew it of him from the start.  I refuse to hold a grudge against sick people, and I let the matter go.

            The chickens are great to be around.  Some are as friendly as pets and love attention.  Chicken behavior is curious to note.  They stand in a spot and scratch the ground, then they back up and pick the ground where they’ve scratched.  They do it over and over, and it’s funny to watch.  Chickens are smart too.  Those little bird brains know when they’re in a cage, and all they want is to get out.  They wait and plot for the slightest chance to escape, but when they get out, they don’t go anywhere.

            The birds are rotated from one stall to another giving a chance for the ground to dry out from their dung.  The vacated stall is scraped of its top soil which is used for winter soil fertilizer.  By the time summer comes, the chicken dung is well worked into the farm’s soil. 

            Chickens need a lot of calcium intake to produce strong eggs.  For this reason, their empty egg shells are first cooked and then crushed and spread lightly about the coup.  If uncooked shells are used, the chickens might take to eating their eggs.

            The weather was still threatening rain when I finished helping John and Greg with the chickens.  With nothing assigned to do, I found Dave in the back field at the end of the main driveway attempting to herd the fifteen or so cattle into the far back field.  With all the cattle hoof prints holding puddles of water, it is a very muddy place and hard to navigate.  The cattle were not cooperating, and I offered to help.  Together we accomplished moving the cattle back.  A new young heifer bull was delivered yesterday to the herd to strengthen the breed. 

            It was mid morning now and the men gathered at the shops to receive more assignments.  The weather kept us on the farm.  Dave set Tim and Jacob to task grinding grain at the grain grinder.  In the grain barn is stored many 55 gallon drums of corn, wheat, oats and other grains.  I was sent with them to help.

            Dennis was walking in the same direction and walked with me part of the way.  He pulled me aside to tell me something.  As we got near the grain barn on the left, Dennis pointed to something on the right. 

            “Do you see that block house over there Brother Mark?” he asked.  “A lot of this stuff you see around here we get donated to us.  A brother came here to visit us last summer and donated all the blocks and labor and built it there for us.”

            “That’s nice,” I said.

            “Yeah it took him a long time to build.  Then when he got done, he got real mad at us and left in a huff.  He thought that since he did us a favor that he could try to stay here and do his own thing.  He wouldn’t submit to his proper position, so it wasn’t easy for him here.  There comes Dave, gotta scoot,” Dennis said, and off he went.

            The block house is a good sized one.  Funny the man left after it was finished.  Did he get better treatment while he had something to offer than when he had finished his charity work?

4

            The grain grinding machine is a strange setup.  It is located on the right of the main drive just opposite the grain bins.  Normally it would be operated by its own motor, but this grinder hasn’t one.  Apparently they found a broken grinder and found a way to make it work.  Here’s what they did.  The main drive pulley of the grinder is exposed where a truck wheel and tire ride against it.  The wheel is mounted to an old truck rear axle which itself is lashed to the ground. 

            The power for the grinder comes from a tractor which is backed up to the wheel and axle where the tractor’s drive shaft is coupled to the wheel.  In this manner, their crazy invention grinds their grain.  But it is quite dangerous when in operation. 

            It is Tim’s most coveted job to work the grinder, and Jacob’s most coveted job to bring over the heavy drums of grain.  Though they both could use my help, again I ran into the vociferous problem of cutting in on their identities when I lent a hand. 

            No one here has more of an identity crisis Jacob.  Being from Canada, he is a long way from home.  Also he is young and not a very big guy.  So when I offered to help him with the drums, it was okay as long as I didn’t help him with the heavy ones.  The corn is the heaviest, and Jacob became quite stressed if I motioned to help him with it.  Also, there are two hand trucks.  Jacob held on to the good hand truck as if it part of his own arm.  Even if I needed it for only a few minutes, he was not going to let it go.  He was so afraid of winding up with the poor hand truck because moving drums with it was quite hard.  Jacob was quite put out that I was taking his work from him.

            But Jacob, John, and Dennis are not the only ones who show this pattern.  I watched Tim to get a feel for what he was doing.  He was getting tired after a while lifting heavy ground grain into empty drums.  Tim is quite strong.  I offered to help, but his response was, “This grinding job is a very important one Brother Mark.  I had to be here for over six months before they let me get near it.  Now it’s my job. “

            Jacob had taken a cue from John and Dennis.  He was suddenly being contentious to me, which is out of character.  After the grinding job was done, I ventured to ask Jacob where all the other guys were and what we were to do next.   He shunned me saying, “Don’t ask me, go ask Brother Dave.”   Knowing that Dave is usually where the action is, I went to look for him in Fellowship Hall. 

            There I found my old lady friend Sarah working away as usual.  She is always cheerful though heavily worked.  My only guess to why she stays here while she is as dismayed by these people as I am is she may have found some purpose or protection here.  It is hard to believe a woman like her can live without the important values of love and friendship.  I have no doubt that these people have developed a bond to each other and would stand behind each other in a crisis, but that’s basic good human nature, however it appears they don’t really like one another. 

            We were alone in the kitchen area and developed some small talk as usual.  She told me more about why she was here, and more about what she was doing at that moment with the various foods.  I remembered my question to John, so I posed it to her.  “What would happen if I thought you are a wonderful person and you were feeling down, and I gave you a big hug to cheer you up where everyone here saw it? “

            With a smile and a look of sadness and concern at once she sighed, “Oh dear, that sort of thing is forbidden here.”

            “Why, this is a normal thing.  I personally don’t go around hugging people, but I reserve that right.”

            “I don’t know, it just never happens.  That would cause a big trouble,” she said.

            Just then, Dennis popped his head in through the back door catching my attention..  He had been gone somewhere all morning. 

            “Hey, I haven’t seen you all day.  We all been working, what you been doing?” I asked.

            “What I was assigned to do in the Glory of God Brother Mark,” Dennis replied. He was playing games again. 

            “Never mind Brother Dennis, just go away,” I said, and he left laughing at me.  I wasn’t angry; it was just Dennis’ way of having fun. 

            I finally found Dave with some other men, and he suggested we find some inside work to do until the weather cleared.  If we were going to work with food, I needed to wash my hands.  I stepped outside to the hand pump, but I could find no soap.  There is always abundant soap in the out house, so I went there and brought a new bar to the sink pump so that there would be soap there for later.  Usually all one can find at the pump is little tinny left over pieces of soap which barely stay in your hand as you try to use them.  Who could balk at a nice new bar on hand?  This act has importance for what I will write further down.

            I went to the root house to find and help Enoch with the sorting.  Enoch and I could work in silence now that I know the routine.  Enoch is not one for conversation.  He just listens to the ever present sound of the repetitive Overcomer Broadcast coming into every place all day and night and hums and whispers to himself in deep thought.  Wayne and Greg came into the root house an hour later to find some hydrogen-peroxide (OH). 

            Wayne and Enoch talked about the benefits of OH between each other, and how they could better make it.  I listened and then added a comment.  “You know, I need to get some OH too.  Hopefully it’s part of something else I can use to brush my teeth.  I don’t trust the fluoride that is in most tooth paste, it’s poisonous.” 

            “Take some of ours Brother Mark,” Enoch said.

            “I stopped using tooth paste because of the fluoride,” said Wayne.

            “I’ve tried baking soda, but my teeth won’t be white. But that fluoride is dangerous,” I said.

            “What do you use Brother Mark?” asked Wayne.

            “I’ve only got the regular old tooth paste for now.  I can’t think of what else to use.”

            “Kind of ‘brushing with the fluoride on faith hey Brother Mark?  On faith?” Wayne mocked.  He was playing “tit for tat,” and he had me on it too. 

5

            At about 15:30, Dave called for all the men.  He had decided that the rain was not going to start and that we had better go get that wood he saw.  There was also some valuable cherry wood which he saw on a second pass during the day, and he dearly wanted it too.  Cherry wood tea is good for what ales you.  So I went to my room to get Doug’s boots after loading the tools on the big truck, and I passed Troy along the way.  He was proudly wearing his ski cap I gave him.

            From the truck bed, I watched the houses and farms of the town go by.  What a quiet little community this is.  San Diego was like it once, but not any more.  Dave and Wayne were in the cab, the rest of us sat in the cold wind.  Doug, Simon and Enoch were talking about Biblical numerology, which I know a lot about.  It appeared they had reached the limit of their knowledge, so I filled in some blanks for them.  They were glad to hear what I had to say until I told them that only the King James Bible fit the numbering system of God exactly.  Once I mentioned the King James Bible, they all looked away.  I mentioned Edward Vallowe’s book on Bible numbers, but they were no longer interested.  Our conversations ended when the truck stopped and Dave got out of the cab.  He caught a fragment of what we were talking about and made a comment to me.

            “Brother Mark, are you still trying to push the King James Version of the Bible on these guys?” Dave asked snidely. 

            The realization that Dave was being reported to on everything I say sunk in at that moment.  I had not brought the King James subject up around Dave,  only to Dennis and John, yet he used the word “still” in his remark.  Big Dave is always watching!  

            There were three chain saws with us on the truck.  The mangled mess of downed trees dictated that all three would be needed.  But running a chain saw is a “higher” duty, and a mere “lesser brother” it seems is not anointed to use them.  I did not know this of course, and when Wayne and Enoch grabbed one each, and one was left with no one volunteering to use it, I grabbed it.  I’m an old hand at chain saws, so this is a natural reaction for me.  I soon found out the errors of my ways when Dave announced,  “Brother Mark, you go put that saw back on the truck.  We have an operator already.  Go put it back on the truck.”  So I put the saw down and started hauling wood out of the mud and muck and twisted branches.  Then later Simon walked up and grabbed the chain saw without a word of protest from Dave.  Now I understood.  Simon is cool, the rest of us are slaves. 

            Loading the wet dirty logs is heavy hard work.  I kept up with the boys though.  The logs were cut as long as possible for one or two men to lift it to the truck and trailer. I fell in the mud a few times while carrying some big ones, but it was a lot of fun.  I liked getting dirty and tired today, but I’m running out of clean laundry!

            Back at the farm, we were standing around admiring our load.  I was thinking out loud and made a comment while we were all standing there.  “Boy, unloading will be a lot easier than loading,” I said, “because all we have to do is hang them off the end and lop off pieces.”

            Dave heard that, of course, and barked,  “Brother Mark, don’t tell us how to do our job.  We’ve been doing this for a long time. We know exactly what we’re going to do, and we don’t need your input.”

            This time I defended myself.  “Allow me to think out loud.  I’m not telling anything, just commenting that we could.  That’s all.”

            “Oh we could.  That’s all huh?  You just keep quiet and we’ll tell you where to be when the time comes. You’re not here to think for yourself.” Dave retorted.

            Of course I was right because they did exactly what I guessed we would do.  We cut and stacked wood directly off the back end of the trailer and finished just as the dinner bell rang at 17:30

6

            We were very dirty when we arrived for dinner.  The men gathered around at the water pump to wash up.  They stumbled around looking for soap slivers to use as usual, but I remembered that I brought a new bar to the pump earlier and started looking for it.  It was not there.

            “I wonder where that bar of soap went?” I thought aloud.

            “What are you looking for Brother Mark?” Dave injected.

            “I put some soap here at lunch so we wouldn’t have trouble finding soap to clean up before supper.  It’s not here.”

            “What soap!  We have soap!” he snapped as he held up a tiny sliver in his wet fingers. “

            “Oh, but I put a whole new one here somewhere.”

            “You brought one from where?” Dave asked now panting feverishly.

            “I found some in the out house.”

            “Brother,” Dave said while shaking his head and making a disgusted motion with his body, “you don’t do that.  You don’ t decide to do anything on your own here.  We will get the soap if we think we need it.  I can see now that we’re going to have to get real rough on you if you don’t shape up”

            I stood looking at him askance without saying a word. 

            “Look,” he continued while getting his face into mine, “you don’t even hear me.  You’re not even listening!”  But I was quite defiant.  I really despise this guy now after all I have done to try to get along.  Dave is a ridiculous fool.  I had a mind to slug him right off, but Jesus was right there with me and kept me cool.  I was quite tired from working hard and enthusiastically all day, and I came very close to causing him some real pain over his attitude toward me.

            After dinner I went with Wayne again to the dairy.  Wayne mumbled something shameful at me, but when I pressed him to repeat it, he laughed and denied he ever said anything, so I let it go.  Dave was nowhere in sight.  Wayne  had me and two small boys begin to help him with the cows.  The cows were eager to eat.  Wayne was teaching me some things when suddenly Dave’s voice roared in again.

            “Now Brother Mark, I told you that the cows don’t know you and for you to let them alone.  You can stay, but just get out of the way,” Dave said as he came out from nowhere.  None the less, as soon as I heard his voice, I was already motivating myself out the door.  Wayne knew that would happen - he set me up!

7

          It is now my perspective that most of the run-ins I’ve had with Dave have been set-ups.  Dave has used these set-ups to strengthen his grip on the others.  Who would oppose him if they saw the consequences first hand.  And, by the way the guys talk, I’m not the first one who has received such treatment.  Dave’s practiced and cleaver choice of words have put an emotional grip upon these men.  Between Dave and me, today was a disaster.  I won’t stay to next week if he keeps this up, let alone three whole months. 

            I could not sleep tonight wondering what to do.  I decided I need to make a telephone call.  In the Fellowship Hall, there is a telephone.  All long distance calls from there are paid for by the Overcomer, but I did not come here to take from them, and also I want no record of the call, so I paid for it on my card.  At midnight, while everyone was sleeping, I went and made a call to San Diego - it was only 21:00 there - to friends James and Juliet.  They too listen to the Overcomer over short-wave and were interested in what I discovered here.  They both come on the line.

            “Well, you won’t believe what I’ve found here.  They have treated me so badly on a personal level, I’m beside myself.” I exclaimed, “Here we have a full fledged cult.  Mind control, restrictions, the whole bit.  All except violence.  It stumps me how they call themselves Christians.”  I told them a lot of things about how “Orwellian” it is here.  It is an enigma that these folks hate the New World Order, and yet have created it in full force on a small scale.  

            “In front of me by the phone was a sign that reads “BE PLEASANT,” and I noticed those little signs all around,” I said.

            “It sounds creepy Mark. It reminds me of the sigh “BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING” of George Orwell’s book ‘1984’.  It is Aldus Huxley’s “Brave New World” there.  A cast society at its best?” said Juliet.  “I could have guessed you’d not be accepted there.  You’re against that type of mentality because you know the Truth in Jesus.  Sounds like Stair has built himself a little kingdomship.“

            “You should know Mark,” James said, “You say that you are in no physical danger there, but consider this.  Should you be allowing people to treat you like that?  There’s nothing wrong with you that makes me think you caused it.  In fact I’d just take off right now were I you.  Man, I’d have said ‘up yours’ to them the first day.”

            “There’s another danger too Mr. Mark.  “Juliet was speaking again.  “The longer you are there and see that, the more you’ll grow to accept it.  You may think you’re strong and that Dave does not effect you, but by now I’m sure you’ve seen what God wants you to see.  Don’t tempt God, take heed for your soul and get the hell out of there if it’s that bad.  I’m sure you’re not exaggerating to us.   That’s our advice Mark.“

            “I’m going to give it one more day to finish off a week. If things don’t improve, I’m out of here,” I said. 

            “Listen, if you come back here, leave the Texas accent behind.  You sound like you were born there.  And don’t bring any ‘truth’ and ‘praise your name’ sayings back with you either!  Ha ha ha.  Deal?” Juliet said.

            “Deal,” I said and we hung up.

            No love, no lives, no identities, no property, not liberty, these people are puppets on a jester’s emotional strings dancing to someone else’s tune.  These folks need so much prayer.  It is so easy for some to let all go and be fed and taken care of without any responsibilities.  A true child of God though has his own identity to live by. There is only one master that is in heaven.  So sad is this people’s reality, yet they have no longer anywhere else to go.  It does not dismiss the fact that they gave up on themselves voluntarily  They forgot that the prophets and the preachers are servants, not rulers.  There are no god-men.

            Oh thank God for Truth and the Word.  Amen.

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